Post Diagnosis B – What Actually Happened
1) My partner hasn’t bothered to do much reading/research about autism. I got him a copy of “I am Aspien Woman” by Tania Marshall which has lots of pictures, but he couldn’t even be bothered to read it, managing about a quarter of it before he got bored.
I get the impression that he is fed up with the whole thing. I am scared to mention the A word. He said that “he wished that things could go back to normal”. He has made no concessions and no attempts to understand me better, as a result of my diagnosis.
2) My mother hasn’t mentioned autism at all since I told her the result of the diagnostic assessment.
3) My friend B asked me one small question about my autism when she first found out and then quickly changed the subject back to herself and the endless stream of dubious men that she has been dating. That was months ago and she’s still talking about them.
4) Attempts to become active in online Autism/Asperger’s forums and support groups have been only partially successful. I keep coming up against instances of people with an Asperger’s diagnosis implying that those diagnosed with Autism are completely different from them in a not-quite-so-good way. As you can imagine, that makes me a little annoyed.
5) My beautiful spiral galaxy tattoo’s had to be put on hold. I have arachnophobia and I’ve just realized that I will see it out of the corner of my eye and keep thinking that there’s a giant spider on my arm.
6) I have come to the conclusion that nobody gives a monkey’s, which is probably what I should have expected, because nobody ever has.
All in all, a bit of an anti-climax.
I’m sorry that those close to you aren’t being more supportive. I’m part way through diagnosis and had to tell my mother to find out about my childhood. She recently taliked about how there no autistic children when she or I were growing up, and has asked me nothing about if I’ve heard anything. I feel quite disorientated and alone. It is good to read your blog.
Hi Liz,
I’m glad that you enjoyed reading the blog. It’s difficult when those surrounding us don’t understand/take an interest in something that is very important to us. There are many people in the same situation as you, so you’re not completely alone. It is possible that your mother will start to take more of an interest once you are formally diagnosed.
Take Care, Cat
Wow, thank you for sharing your experiences. It makes so much sense to me as I was born in the 60s and would now call myself a high-functioning person with autism – doubly gifted, as some would say. I am finally understanding some of the anomalies of my life. Why things that I say aren’t considered funny, when someone else can say the same thing and everyone laughs. Or why my intellect has been valued and used at work, but no-one wants to visit my house or share a meal.
Thank you again and treat yourself kindly!
I’m glad that you enjoyed reading about my experiences. I’ve spent a lifetime hoping that one day I would find other people who would understand the way I felt and thought. Let us hope that the knowledge and acceptance of our autism will bring about a new and positive chapter in our lives, Cat